We have dust in our souls.  Places of potential for sin and death but when we give this dust to God its a source of life and transformation .  God makes beautiful things from the humblest of origins.  I AM DUST I AM GOD’s will look at several figures from our Gospel stories from their first encounter with Jesus to the cross and beyond.  And we will see how God takes the dust in their lives and makes it His.  Join us and let Him who formed us from the dust breathe life into you!   

READING PLAN

WEEK SIX: I AM BARABBAS Jesus has taken my place

DAY ONE

Now at the festival the governor was accustomed to release a prisoner for the crowd, anyone whom they wanted. 16 At that time they had a notorious prisoner, called Jesus Barabbas. 17 So after they had gathered, Pilate said to them, “Whom do you want me to release for you, Jesus Barabbas or Jesus who is called the Messiah?”  Matthew 27:15 

Clearly Barabbas is us.  We are Barabbas.  He is meant to literally stand where our sins place us, and that is condemned to die.  Most of us have never instigated an insurrection or murdered anyone as Luke tells us Barabbas had.  However, we have had hatred for others in our hearts.  Jesus in Matthew 5 lets us know this is enough to be liable to hell.  As 1 John 3:15 puts it: Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him.

We have wanted power or control in situations enough to commit sins deep enough for our cowardly courage to handle.  
We stand condemned and the purity of Christ stands beside us and remains silent in self defense allowing himself to be taken in our place.

Prayer:
Dear Jesus you stand condemned in my place.
I should be the one indicted.  
It is my sin that has condemned me.
And yet you paid the price.
Thank you Jesus for my salvation.
Forgive me for my sins.
And teach me to walk like you.
Amen.

DAY TWO

Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Couldn't you men keep watch with me for one hour?" he asked Peter.  Matthew 26:40
In this last week of Christ’s life:
His disciples fell asleep on him in his hour of need
Then fled him
One betrayed him
One, while within line of sight of Jesus on trial, denied knowing him three times.
The crowds that had come to him for healing and teaching now for a few coins in their hands shouted, “Let his blood be on us and our children.”
His enemies gloated over him.
The government was indifferent to the injustice perpetrated towards him.
He was beaten and mocked by cruel men who didn’t even know him.
Whipped nearly to death, he was stripped naked and forced to carry his own tool of death down a long road.
And then they nailed him to that cross.
There the ridicule continued.
Until a spear pierced his side to ensure he was indeed dead.
And why?  Because he threatened the shallow ego of a few leaders.
Because he refused to take up a sword like the crowd desired.
Because Rome was more interested in keeping the status quo than true justice.
Because his own closest followers could not trust him enough to stick by his side even though he had told them all this would happen.
And what of us?
Have we fallen asleep in our call to prayer?
When it all gets a bit too much do we move churches or cut off relationships?
Do we betray Jesus in our treatment of the needy?
Do we deny him when showing our faith would cost us something...maybe even just a bit of embarrassment?
Would we rather have what we are used to instead of looking into the injustice done to so many around?
Like the crowd do we turn on Jesus when our American dream conflicts with his call to self sacrifice, service, and humility, even humiliation?
If so remember...he died for you already.  But now maybe it's time to live fully for him?

PRAYER:
Jesus so many betrayed you that week.  And so have I.
Forgive me I pray.
For falling asleep in hours of need, for not trusting you enough, for turning my back in moments my faith would cost me something,
For denying the injustice all around me, even joining in mocking you in the faces of of people of color and injustice because I find the status quo for me to be very comfortable.
Lord I have in many ways denied you, forgive me I pray.
Open my eyes to those in need, give me faith to trust in you, boldness to show my faith, and a love to confront injustice I pray.
AMEN

DAY THREE

Matthew 27:15-23
15 Now at the festival the governor was accustomed to release a prisoner for the crowd, anyone whom they wanted. 16 At that time they had a notorious prisoner, called Jesus Barabbas. 17 So after they had gathered, Pilate said to them, “Whom do you want me to release for you, Jesus Barabbas or Jesus who is called the Messiah?” 18 For he realized that it was out of jealousy that they had handed him over. 19 While he was sitting on the judgment seat, his wife sent word to him, “Have nothing to do with that innocent man, for today I have suffered a great deal because of a dream about him.” 20 Now the chief priests and the elders persuaded the crowds to ask for Barabbas and to have Jesus killed. 21 The governor again said to them, “Which of the two do you want me to release for you?” And they said, “Barabbas.” 22 Pilate said to them, “Then what should I do with Jesus who is called the Messiah?” All of them said, “Let him be crucified!” 23 Then he asked, “Why, what evil has he done?” But they shouted all the more, “Let him be crucified!”

Now what turned this crowd so fast?  Really guys?
Jesus had been preaching and teaching, healing and curing them.  
They had followed him and been wowed by how.  
They enjoyed seeing him put the Pharisees and Scribes in their place!  
But how quickly their hearts do turned!  And for what?
Matthew tells us it was a matter of a few well placed coins.
That is what some say this term persuaded them meant.  
But wither coin, promised favors, or just being in the Scribes and Pharisees good favor (I mean after all look at what they where doing to their enemy right at the moment) the crowds sold out.

It had to be more than a few coins or a little favor right?  I’d like to think so.  
Why? Because I’d hate to think the human heart face to face with Christ could be so easily tempted away.  
To think that just the glint of a bit of gold could drive from the mind their amazing wonders Jesus had shown them!  

I don’t like this thought because it forces me to put myself in their place.  
It asks me am I made of the same stuff of these faithless masses?  
Would I? Do I turn on Jesus for a bit of coin and the promise of a small reward?  
I’ll leave myself to ponder these questions and I call you to do the same.  
And if you promise not to ask me what shinies I might be tempted to trade the Savior for I won’t ask you yours.  
But let's encourage each other to seek his forgiveness.
And the next time that shine of sin tempts us...let us say I would have Jesus today not Barabbas.

PRAYER
Oh Father it is so easy to judge the thin faith of others.
But if we let your Holy Spirit search us and show us
we will find shameful trades in our past and in the passions of our soul.
At times we have sold Christ within us out for a handful of coins,
a bit of passion, indulgences, vengeance, satisfaction
You name the currency we have taken the trade.
Yet if we let Your Spirit take us even deeper
we may behold the passions and foolishness that drive these exchanges.  
And in this time of Lent as Easter looms large let us crucify this old self
that we might be raised this Easter in our hearts and attitudes with Christ in resurrection.
AMEN

DAY FOUR

Mark 15:15 Wishing to satisfy the crowd, Pilate released Barabbas for them, and after having Jesus scourged, he handed Him over to be crucified.

Pilate is a man we certainly could have asked about in this whole series.  His wife warns him from a dream not to have anything to do with Jesus.  
Pilate seeking to rid the guilt from himself washes his hands of Jesus blood.  Not a very convincing action when he decides also to have him whipped prior to execution.    
Pilate stands in as Rome in the Gospels.  That is he is worldly power.
And he'd rather maintain personal and political self preservation. then get wrapped up in all this mess.
He perceived no guilt in Jesus but let us be clear Pilate is not motivated by sympathy or a desire to have clean hands.  
In fact Pilate had come down so hard on the last insurrectionist that the Emperor had sent him a warning to not be so violent.
Now a warning against brutality from Rome...that was quit the accomplishment.  
No Pilate is no poor soul caught in the cross fire whose poor innocent hands are tied by the will of the people.  
He's a shrewd man trying to have it both ways.  To satisfy the leaders who want Jesus dead and yet avoid the wrath of the people.
And he plays his card well.  
Some commentators argue that the warning from Pilates wife came because she was one of the woman who had financially supported Jesus ministry.
There is some contextual evidence for this slim though it is.   But if so think of how complex Pilate's position is in this situation.  
And yet still it comes back to what's best for Pilate and how will he keep power.
Courting the powers of the world church will at best get you a Pilate.  
A powerful person who by self interest may support your cause but whose ultimate north star will always be self preservation.
The only force that can truly change a people, a nation, a world is the force of the Holy Spirit that resides within the church.  

PRAYER:
Jesus, help me not be fooled by the powers of this earth.
May I live into your Kingdom and become a proud citizen of that nation.
The world will always seek self preservation while you died for all.
I do not wish to follow the world but only you Lord Jesus.
Help me to put my faith only in your will and way.
May I die for you.  Die to my own self preservation.  
So please give me the courage to live a sacrificial life as you did.
AMEN.


WEEK FIVE: I AM Judas  from temptation to betrayal

DAY ONE

“Some have said, that Judas sinned more in despairing of the mercy of God, than in betraying his Master’s blood.” Neither Judas’ betrayal nor his suicide is the unforgiveable sin, only his refusal to seek the grace of Christ. Peter and Judas both committed heinous transgressions, but Peter found restoration when he repented." (From the Matthew Henry Commentary,)

Had Judas repented we’d have seen a very different end to Judas life.  
Or rather had he fully repented.   Listen to how Judas does repent…

Matthew 27:3 When Judas, his betrayer, saw that Jesus was condemned, he repented and brought back the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders. 4 He said, “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood.” But they said, “What is that to us? See to it yourself.” 5 Throwing down the pieces of silver in the temple, he departed; and he went and hanged himself.

He repents but does not bring this to God.  He does not trust God’s mercy enough to attempt to draw close to Jesus again.  The Matthew Henry Commentary finishes its reflection on Judas with these words "Today let us repent of our sins and turn to Jesus, knowing that He offers pardon to all those who trust Him alone.."

PRAYER:
Jesus I know that your grace and mercy are far greater than my sins will ever be.  
Forgive me for my sins of thought, word, and deed.
For my sins known and unknown.
I have sinned against You and others.
Forgive me I pray.
Lead me into a greater love for You and service to my neighbor.
And may I never forget that no matter how far my thoughts, words or deeds maybe from You...
I am never more than a pray of repentances away from Your grace.
AMEN

DAY TWO

Even my close friend whom I trusted, he who shared meals with me, has turned against me. Psalm 41:9
In our familiarity with Judas' betrayal we may fail to remember how close he was to Jesus.  
We can find ourselves thinking of him as lurking on the edges cloaked in darkness as da Vinci painted him in the Last Supper.  
But he ate with Jesus at Lazarus' table.  He dipped his bread in the oil after Jesus at the Last Supper.
Judas' betrayal may seem distant and unrelatable to us.  
However, each day we have choices to live into the teachings of Jesus or our own wants and desires.
  • To turn the other cheek or to satisfy our anger in ungody ways.
  • To trust the bonds of marriage to supply the intricacy God has for us or to go seeking it elsewhere.
  • To be grateful and have contentment in our processions or to arrange our life choices around the acquisition of more.
  • To be generous or to selfishly cling to what God calls us to hand over to Him in service to others.  
No this is not selling Jesus for a hand full of silver but its a step in that direction.

Selling out rarely happens over night but as small spiritual and moral defeats accumulate so does our capacity for them.
Luke 12:15 Then he said to them, "Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions."
When we drop our guard little by little we move towards bigger and bigger sellouts until one day we find our hands full of silver and our hearts full of regret.

PRAYER:
Jesus, increase my vigilance.
Help me to not sell you out but to sell out to you.
Warn me when my mind, my words, or my feet begin to wonder where they should not go.
Draw me back to your side.
AMEN

DAY THREE

John 13:24-27 Simon Peter got this follower (John) to look his way. He wanted him to ask Jesus which one He was speaking of. While close beside Jesus, he asked, “Lord, who is it?” Jesus answered, “It is the one I give this piece of bread to after I have put it in the dish.” Then He put the bread in the dish and gave it to Judas Iscariot, the son of Simon. After Judas had eaten the piece of bread, Satan went into him. Jesus said to Judas, “What you are going to do, do in a hurry.”

Who do you like to sit next to you at dinner?  Not just anyone right?  Friends family that sort.  What about someone you know is about to betray you?  No thanks right?
Notice who is next to Jesus at this meal.  To his left it appears the youngest of the disciples John has taken his seat.  Next to him Peter is close at hand.  But who is to Jesus' right?  
Most likely Jesus would have passed that ceremonially dipped bread to his right.   That was the common custom especially during the ceremonial and formal Passover meal.  
And it is Judas to his right.  The east of honor.
When Jesus asked, "Judas, come sit to my right" how do you think Judas felt?  
What must have been going through Judas' mind at that time.
Was he filled with fear or anguish or had his heart so turned that he by now despised Jesus.  
Why would Jesus do this?  To see him squirm?  That would explain why I would do it but not Jesus.
I would have put Judas far from me.  Honestly I wouldn't have allowed him at the table.
Perhaps in one last gesture of love and reconciliation offers Judas the seat of honor.  
If this is how Jesus responses to his greatest betrayer just imagine the love he calls each of us to sit at his side and enjoy.
Remember His grace and mercy.  In your sin cling to his side.
And know that if there is a distances between you and Jesus you've put it there not him.  
After all he placed Judas next to himself the very night he was betrayed.    

Prayer
Jesus I know that you are with me.
I do not always feel your presence but I do know your word says you are closer than a brother.
You are with me I will not fear.  
Let me know your presence this day and if I am choosing to sit far from you...help me to draw closer to you.
AMEN

DAY FOUR

Luke 6:12-16 list the twelve Disciples by name whom Jesus calls to follow him. Among them is Judas.  
Jesus called Judas.  He drew him into his inner circle to eat with, travel with, and teach.
As frail humans we have a tendency to shut out people we disagree with, don't get along with or what ever our don't 'with' about them is.
Jesus consistently connect with the ones who even rejected him.  When invited to Simon the Pharisee's house for dinner he agrees.  
He receives into his moments of teaching Pharisees, scribes and lawyers who often only come to test him.
And into his inner circle he invites Judas.
Healthy boundaries are important.  There is no doubt about this.
Yet we must remember the example Jesus set of loving even our enemies.

 PRAYER:
Jesus, there are people who test and try me.
I would rather not know their company.  
Some may even wish me harm.
But Lord your heart was open to everyone.
You took risks on people.  
Help me to love even those who challenge me.
Help me to love even my enemies.
And give me wisdom on when to let someone in and when to be wise in caution.
AMEN

WEEK FOUR: I AM PETER human boldness to Godly submission

DAY ONE

John 18:1-11
18 After Jesus had spoken these words, he went out with his disciples across the Kidron valley to a place where there was a garden, which he and his disciples entered. 2 Now Judas, who betrayed him, also knew the place, because Jesus often met there with his disciples. 3 So Judas brought a detachment of soldiers together with police from the chief priests and the Pharisees, and they came there with lanterns and torches and weapons. 4 Then Jesus, knowing all that was to happen to him, came forward and asked them, “Whom are you looking for?” 5 They answered, “Jesus of Nazareth.” Jesus replied, “I am he.” Judas, who betrayed him, was standing with them. 6 When Jesus said to them, “I am he,” they stepped back and fell to the ground. 7 Again he asked them, “Whom are you looking for?” And they said, “Jesus of Nazareth.” 8 Jesus answered, “I told you that I am he. So if you are looking for me, let these men go.” 9 This was to fulfill the word that he had spoken, “I did not lose a single one of those whom you gave me.” 10 Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it, struck the high priest’s slave, and cut off his right ear. The slave’s name was Malchus. 11 Jesus said to Peter, “Put your sword back into its sheath. Am I not to drink the cup that the Father has given me?”

Time and time again Peter presents his boldness to us in the Scriptures and yet it always comes up short!  Poor Peter.

  • Peter walked on water right (Matt 14:22-23) but what do we remember most about that moment?  That he sunk.
  • Peter was martyred for his faith but we know the story of his denial of Christ three times far better. 
  • Peter left everything for Jesus but we know him better as the one to which Jesus said, “Get behind me Satan!”

We resonated with these failings because well we fail.  
We follow Jesus but can’t help but feel like Peter at times.  
We realize there is more to following this first century carpenter than we are living and yet...we often aren’t sure what?  

Peter was bold but in a worldly way.  
I have no doubt if Jesus had drawn a sword with Peter he would have kept fighting those guards to the death.
But when Jesus showed him the Kingdom of God would be won by love in the face of hate and forgiveness in the face of violence well Peter’s boldness petered out.  
You know I never thought about it before is that where we get the saying?

Anyways, the Christian way of boldness is not for wimps.  
It calls us not to take up a sword but a cross.  

Are their swords in your life you need to lay down?
Peter had every right to fight off that wrongful arrest right?  
But Jesus didn’t allow it?  How can that be?  
Reflect on these questions and ask what part of my life am I fighting that God wants me to give the battle to Him?

PRAYER:
Jesus you are the Prince of Peace, help me to lay down my swords.  
You're way is far harder and far better than the one of force, than the road we so often choose.
Help me to love in the face of hate and forgiveness even in the face of violence.
Help me to walk as you walked.  AMEN

DAY TWO

Luke 22:31-26
“Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.” Peter said to him, “Lord, I am ready to go with you both to prison and to death.” Jesus said, “I tell you, Peter, the rooster will not crow this day, until you deny three times that you know me.”

Like Thomas last week, poor Peter is often remembered for his failings and especially this one.  
Jesus expresses a demand from the enemy to sift Peter like wheat.  
Did Satan really have a claim to demands this or did Jesus just see a hard time coming for Peter?  
I really don’t know. Yet, in either case the lesson is the same, trials sift us.  

Whether they come from the Enemy, our bad choices, or just living life they will sift us.  
Sifting wheat was  a process by which the heavier and useful wheat was separated from the stalk and chaff.  Watch this video to get a sense of the violence of the process.  I don't want to be that wheat beaten and shaken and tossed about.

Peter had a boldness that needed sifted.  What was in that boldness that God could work with needed the lesser substances removed from it.  Note that this sifting Jesus prophecies that the sifting will strength his faith.

PRAYER
Lord you sifted Peter to make his faith pure.
I know their is chaff in me, those things that need sifted out.
I pray that you would help me  let this chaff go
May it be blown away in the wind so that what remains in me
is only a pleasing graining offering for You.
Amen

DAY THREE

Luke 4:38-40 After leaving the synagogue he entered Simon’s house. Now Simon’s mother-in-law was suffering from a high fever, and they asked him about her. 39 Then he stood over her and rebuked the fever, and it left her. Immediately she got up and began to serve them. 40 As the sun was setting, all those who had any who were sick with various kinds of diseases brought them to him; and he laid his hands on each of them and cured them.

Take note Peter is not one of the twelve as of yet here.  
We do not know how well Jesus knew Peter yet.  Remember as God's son he lived a perfect human life.
Getting to know people was part of that and yet of course he had divine insight.  
It isn't until chapter 5 that Jesus calls him to become a fisher of men.
Now it might be odd to say Jesus needs to get to know us and it would be untrue.  Of course he knows us.
But we need to get to know him in the way we are created to know someone.
In conversation, in listening, in learning sharing our life with them.
Jesus didn't just pick Peter out of the blue or any of the twelve.  
He called them through a sustained relationship.  
Are you taking time to get to know him?  If your reading this well wonderful!  
But knowing him takes time sitting in his presences.  
Today for our prayer why don't we just sit with him a while?
 
PRAYER
Lord here I am...

DAY FOUR

John 20
Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the tomb. 2 So she ran and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him.” 3 Then Peter and the other disciple set out and went toward the tomb. 4 The two were running together, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. 5 He bent down to look in and saw the linen wrappings lying there, but he did not go in. 6 Then Simon Peter came, following him, and went into the tomb. He saw the linen wrappings lying there, 7 and the cloth that had been on Jesus’ head, not lying with the linen wrappings but rolled up in a place by itself. 8 Then the other disciple, who reached the tomb first, also went in, and he saw and believed; 9 for as yet they did not understand the scripture, that he must rise from the dead. 10 Then the disciples returned to their homes.

This is one of my favorite paintings. Peter and John running tot he Sepulcher by Eugène Burnand 1898.  The perfect mixture of hope and anxiety in their eyes.  John with hands clinched in worry. Peter's hands heavy and weighted.  John who had walked with Jesus through his trail and stood at the foot of the cross is in a white robe airy and light.  Peter is wrapped in a  heavy cloak dark cloak weighted down by the guilt of denying Jesus three times.  You see the innocent hope in John's eyes but Peter in his dark cloak is weighted down his face has more grief to it then John's who looks as one expecting to see a great john.  Peter in contrast is almost wincing.  John's hands are lifting upward while Peter's are dropping even pointing downward.  All this gives the impression of John about to float away while Peter is about to fall to the ground like a dropped rock.  Even the strokes in the garments tell the tale.  The folds of John's robes lift him upwards while Peter's seem to drag him downward.  Its a masterpiece.  

For me it captures in my heart the simultaneous struggle of the hope of the cross that lifts us and the burdens of doubt and failure that can weight us down.  
However in the scriptures John pauses at the tomb while Peter rushes in.  John gets there first but Peter drags them both forward in the end.  As hope drove John to the tomb it is the need of Peter's that in desperation dares to enter the sacred space of the tomb.  

I don't thank God for my sins or my doubts but I am thankful that God can use them to drive me to Him!  To enter that sacred space of knowing I desperately need him!  So desperate that like I would dare to desecrate the sacred for what else have I to lose.  I'm thankful that often God uses what weights me down to get me on my knees in prayer.  

I don't want these things but so often they get me where I need to be so that I can once again wear the garments of hope as John embodies in this painting.

PRAYER
Jesus I give you my burdens, sins and trials.
I bring them to the Tomb where ironically I find hope
Cloth me in the white garment of hope here is my cloak of sin
Lift my dropping hands and renew my aching legs
Give strength to my faith that I might follow you.
AMEN

WEEK THREE: I AM THOMAS big doubts to great faith

DAY ONE

This week as we look at Thomas lets explore the subject of doubt.
One of the all time greatest hymns is Come Thou Fount was written by Robert Robinson in the 18th century.  
The words were inspired by 1 Samuel 7:12 Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Jeshanah, 
and named it Ebenezer; for he said, “Thus far the Lord has helped us.” O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!

The Hymn encourages us to raise our won standing stone to God.
Why? because as the last lines recall we are prone to wonder.  
For some Christians faith is a gift given and never shaken.  
For others like us Thomases we can wonder at times and wander!
Yet, when we take time to mark those moments He has seen us through we raise standing stones of faith.  

Take time today to write your three biggest Standing Stones of Faith!
When your mind wonders and your heart wanders then raise those Ebenezers that declares "Thus far the Lord has helped us.” 
You will find your faith renewed and as the song says you will be bound to Him!

Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above

 TODAY'S PRAYER
My Lord and My God here is my heart take and seal it.
You strengthened the apostle Thomas with sure and certain faith in Jesus' resurrections,
please now strengthen me.
Bind me to You and Your LOVE.
Recall o my heart your faithfulness,
so that my wandering heart and worrying doubts would not unbind me from You.
Amen 


WEEK TWO: I AM MARY MAGDALENE a total mess totally committed to Jesus

DAY ONE

Luke 8:1-3 ESV Soon afterward he (Jesus) went on through cities and villages, proclaiming and bringing the good news of the kingdom of God. And the twelve were with him, and also some women who had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities: Mary, called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had gone out, and Joanna, the wife of Chuza, Herod's household manager, and Susanna, and many others, who provided for them out of their means.

Mary Magdalene is sold out to Jesus.  Mentioned twelve times in the Gospels it is clear she was an early leader in the movement.  Its no wonder she inspire a lot of false speculations and even a false gospel! The Gospel of Mary was written in the 2nd century and falsely claims to be written by Mary.  In the excerpt below Mary has just explained to the disciples that Jesus was only spirit and not flesh.  And that all flesh is evil.  Jesus didn't come to redeem creation but destroy it and set them free from it.  
CHAPTER 9:The Gospel of Mary
When Mary had said this, she fell silent...
Peter answered...“Did He really speak privately with a woman and not openly to us?....Did He prefer her to us?”
...Levi answered and said to Peter, "Peter you have always been hot tempered...He/Jesus loved her more than us."

It makes me laugh a bit but it was a false and dangerous document in its time! It is obviously a fake to us but it led serious seekers astray.  Why?  They didn't know any other Jesus.  
How could they see the falsehood in it unless they had know him?  Why talk about false gospels?
When people see us what sort of Gospel are they reading in us?  A true gospel or a false one.  
For some folks we are all they have when it comes to seeing Jesus.
Let me tell you about the true witness of Mary Magdalene.  
Mary's story is one of utter devotion that reveals the true nature of Jesus.  
His ability to free us from sin.
His compassion and kindness.
And her response as she lived a fully devoted life to Jesus in which anyone could read the true Gospel.
She followed him, hoped in him, financial support him, and deeply loved him!  
She was a 100% sold out to him.  Nothing foolish there.

When others see you what is the Gospel they read?
If they don't know him will the way you live, act, and behave lead them in the right direction or like our foolish Gospel of Mary give them the wrong idea?
We may not teach Christological heresies but our actions can certainly be inconsistent with the Gospel.
Do we love our neighbor as ourselves?  
Do we dare to love our enemies?  
Do we refrain from unwholesome talk keeping from gossip and running others down.
Do we take care of the widow orphans neglected and rejected?  Or are we more ready to complain about them?
We may be the only Gospel someone reads and who is the Jesus they will find there?

 TODAY'S PRAYER
Jesus I am so thankful for the demons saved me from.
In response to your amazing grace in my life I am 100% yours!
Let others see you in me, not a false gospel.
Let them see the gospel that is full of love, grace, and mercy.
A Gospel that recognizes our sins but does not dwell in them.
I am sold out to you Jesus...so help me live it out too.
AMEN

DAY TWO

READ John 20:11-16
In verse 16 Mary says to Jesus “Rabbouni!” (which means Teacher).  The Gospel's elevate the role of women beyond the traditional accept place.  I fresh reading of Matthew will reveal that throughout we see the woman behaving as trues disciples while the Apostles miss it at times.  It is Mary Magdalene to whom Jesus first appears.  It is Samaritan woman of ill repute that becomes the first missionary going back to her people to share the news of Jesus.  This is important to note for two reasons.

FIRST: Jesus did not treat women as second class citizens in the Kingdom.  Certainly a message we ought to know by now.
SECOND: Jesus was counter cultural in his behavior.  That is he was not afraid to go against the common accepted norms of the day even if it would garner him criticism.  

What norms of our day might you be accepting that do not comply to the call of a disciple of Jesus?
Our culture establish a standard of living that far exceeds what the Scriptures encourage of us and drive us to acquire more while others do not have enough.  
James 2:15-16 15 If a brother or sister is naked and lacks daily food, 16 and one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and eat your fill,” and yet you do not supply their bodily needs, what is the good of that?

We live in a culture that denigrates those they disagree with.  FB is flooded with hateful comments for those with whom we disagree.  It is not to be so for us.
1 John 4:20-21 20 Those who say, “I love God,” and hate their brothers or sisters, are liars; for those who do not love a brother or sister whom they have seen, cannot love God whom they have not seen. 21 The commandment we have from him is this: those who love God must love their brothers and sisters also.

Many of our polices and words assume the worst of those who are different form the majority in our culture.  And it is that way all around the world.  Here is how Scripture encourages us to behave.  
Leviticus 19:33-34 33 When an alien resides with you in your land, you shall not oppress the alien. 34 The alien who resides with you shall be to you as the citizen among you; you shall love the alien as yourself, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God

In all things Scripture calls us to be vulnerable in our love.  And yet we have a world that refuses to be vulnerable but would rather cut each other off than turn the other check when wrongs occur.  
Matthew 6:14-14 For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; 15 but if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. 

IT what way's might God be calling you to be counter cultural?  

TODAYs PRAYER
LORD, I am not to conform to this culture.
I know when you refused it cost you your life.
Help me to lay my life down for you today maybe even my reputation.
I want to be Kingdom Cultured not conformed to the culture of this world.
I know it won't be easy but I know that is why discipleship is described as taking up my cross.
Give me strength I'll need it!
AMEN

DAY THREE

John 19 but standing by the cross were his mother's sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene.
In first century culture women played a lesser role then men.  Scripture often reveals that it is the weak that overcomes the strong.  God uses that which is small in our own eyes to overcome the proud and powerful.  In this case the strong men could not show their faces at the cross.  They feared they would be next.  Yet, because of their low status in society the women could be there to minster to Jesus.

Of course we know it is an injustice to treat women or anyone like they are a lower status.
Unfortunately the pay wage gap reveals for woman and minorities we still do not equally value them!  
But the focus I want for us today is this.  
You don't know what God can work through what others consider your weaknesses.  
Maybe even what you consider to be your weaknesses.  
Do not let your own misguided perceptions of your limitations or flaws hold you back.
That's the Enemy talking so don't give him the pleasurer of your attention.  
Rather, let Jesus define you.  
You may find that God works best through your weaknesses.
You may even find in the end that is through these that you are able to minister the best!  

TODAYs PRAYER
LORD, may I be defined by you.
Not others, not the Enemy and certainly not myself.
You and only you get to say who I am.  
Your word says you have a new name for me (Rev. 2:17).
And that I will receive it on a white stone when I triumph through you.
It will define me completely as yours.
So today and every day forward let me live into that new name more and more.
For your glory and my joy.
AMEN.

DAY FOUR

Mark 16:1 When the Sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene and Mary the mother of James and Salome bought spices, so that they might go and anoint him.

Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only little. - Edmund Burke
Well it must have felt like very little to dress Jesus body after his death.  It was all they had left to do.  All their hopes and dreams and love were burred in that tomb and this one final act after such high expectations was important but had to feel futile.  And yet through this small custom came the first witnesses of the resurrection.

What small thing can you do for God today?  
Do not hold back thinking it only a small gesture and so devalue its potential.  
Mary and the other women put their whole selves into this small task.  
So to should you today

TODAYs PRAYER
LORD, what do you desire of me today?
No matter how small the task may I be bold in performing it.
May go as you lead and both be blessed in the doing and blessing in the giving.
AMEN.

WEEK ONE: I AM JOHN a brief study in the life of the Apostle John

DAY ONE

According to tradition John was the youngest of the disciples.  To reflect this John is often depicted in classic artwork as the only beardless disciple.  Despite his youth John was one of the boldest of the 12.  He confronted a man that he felt was using Jesus’ name wrongly Mark 9:38-40.  In Luke 9:51-56 he and his older brother James ask Jesus if he wants them them to call down fire on some Samaritans that refused them hospitality.  Yet his boldness is a bit dusty and self serving at times.
Read Matthew 20:17-28
Note what you observe in the sequence of events and write it down.  

Why was James’ and John’s timing particularly bad?

If you’d been one of the other ten how would you have felt towards James and John?

John’s boldness led to amazing things but here it's not so amazing.  If dust is a symbol of death and sin we could say his boldness was a bit dusty.  

Now Read Genesis 2:7 and discover what God can do with dust…

In each of us is some dust his potential but also potential sin.  There is in us all trait, a gift, a talent that God wants to get a hold of and breathe life into.  What dust might there be in your life?

What is its potential for sin and death and what is its potential if you let God use it?

Prayer this prayer...
God where within me is dust I need to hand over to You?
Dust you long to breathe life into?
Give me the courage to hand it over to You.
I know I’m not perfect and like John I’ll certainly make mistakes.
I’ll  misuse at times the potential you’ve given me.  
But when I do may You and others show me mercy.
And Lord I thank You for Your promise to make beauty from the dust of my life.  AMEN

Day Two

Would you leave your job for Jesus?
What about a really good job that is going well, maybe even your own business that is booming.  Its doing so well you are buying new equipment and hiring employees to get all the work done?
That would be tough enough I suppose.
How about your family?  Would you leave family obligations behind to follow Jesus?
Outlandish right.  God would never ask that of us...would he?

That's just what Jesus asked John to do.  Read Mark‬ ‭1:18-20‬ ‭NRSV‬‬
He (JESUS) saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John, who were in their boat mending the nets. Immediately he called them; and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men, and followed him.”

Zebedee had a boat and hired men.  Business is booming.  His two sons had an obligation stronger than any in modern culture to stay with him and continue his work.  It was the family retirement plan.  The sons help with the work, learn the work, take over the work and eventually dad can't anymore so he leaves it to the boys.  And they take care of him and mom.  Honor they mother father!  

Now following a wondering Rabbi...well not much money in that folks.  Yet John (along with James) just up and leave this and their father behind.

Its hard to imagine Jesus would ask us to leave a good job.  It would be harder to imagine Jesus asking us to shift our responsibilities to our families over to hired hands.  He wouldn't do that! Ahh but he did and often.  It really seems to be his thing actually.  From Abraham to Jesus in the garden God asks a lot of us.  And the more you give...the more you are blessed.  But the blessing well it can be hard to see it coming down the road and that iw where faith comes in to play.  

Abraham left his people and God made a new people from him .  
John left a booming fishing industry behind and his father's heritage.  It would be safe and secure.  Surely God wanted that for him.  Think how he could have blessed his community, and his family even the local economy.  But when John gave up the good blessing he had for the one Jesus promised his father's heritage became pillars of the faith.  John didn't just bless the people of Capernaum his home town he blessed cultures, nations, the whole world, you and I with the fourth Gospel.  And that's not mention his work in founding the church in the very beginning.  Where would that be had John not walked away from the many secure blessings God had planned for him in his cultures mind, his father's mind?  A boat the hired men and even his father?  Yes God asks hard thing of us but I'm sure he provided for what John left behind and He will for us as well.  Will you be faithful in little or in much today?  

What blessing can you not imagine God asking of you?  Could you give them up?

Prayer
Jesus, when you call may I have the courage to follow.  
If you ask me to lay down my nets help me to have the faith to do so.
I cannot see the blessing you might have for me but I am not called to walk by sight but by faith.  
May I do so today and more so everyday. AMEN

Day Three

Read the account of the Transfiguration as it is know in Matthew 17:1-13
As you read:
  • Note what stands out to you. 
  • What questions does the passage raise
  • How would you have felt on the mountain top?
    • Would have felt the need like Peter to say something?
    • Of like John and James would you have remined silent?

John was part of Jesus inner circle.  It makes me uncomfortable to think of Jesus having favorites. and well he doesn't, not really.  
What he does have is a deep understanding of who each of us are and what we are each capable of receiving and doing for him.
John was fortunate that Jesus deemed him ready for this weighty knowledge but Jesus didn't show this too him the first day John was called.
Many other signs and wonders prepared him for that day.  
You may not understand yet but God preparing you.  
You may not even understand now the depth of love for him and others you will one day have.  
But if we walk with him each day and slowly climb that mountain who knows what wonders we will see!

Prayer
Jesus, I thank you that you guide me each day.
You patiently and faithfully reveal yourself to those who seek you.
I am seeking you today.  
Show me the transformation you are working in my life,
 as I follow you in faith each day.
Amen